"I'm not afraid of storms, for I'm learning how to sail my ship."

So here I am 4 days out from the 2010 CrossFit Sectionals for the Central Southern Texas Region, anxiously awaiting the heats and WOD's that will be let out of secret hiding today. I am going to be completely honest, I have been a complete mess worrying about this weekend. What will the workouts be, will I be strong enough, fast enough, flexible enough. How will I do, am I ready to compete at this elite level against some of the fittest women in Texas if not the world? Will I come in last...will I get my first DNF??....the list goes on and on. I would say as of this morning I was 30% excited and 70% scared. Ok maybe 90% scared 10% excited...yes I know it should be flipped. For me this is easier said then done. "This should be for fun and a great experience since I have never competed individually before in my life, or at elite level like this. Plus we are doing our affiliate team anyways so lets give it go" those were the words that came out of my mouth the day after I signed up 6 weeks ago when I decided to randomly sign up for the sectionals. I was training just to see since December but thought it wasn't my year. Well I was wrong. SOOO I have been training even harder, really pushing myself past where I thought I even would. I am stronger and faster. More Flexible and Fit. I have beat my body down through tons of two-a-days trying to prepare in every way I can. I have fueled my body to the best of my ability staying about 90-95% paleo. I am prepared to the best of my ability and have done everything that I can to prepare.... right? I love CrossFit ....right? I am CrossFit remember!!! So if that's the case then what the hell is wrong with me? I had a few hours with myself this morning and decided to find something that I was going to say to myself every time I had doubt and worries about this weekend. Something I would say when I could feel my hands shaking, when my heart starts to pound and my breathes falls short. So as Corney as it sounds I closed my eyes and immediately what came to my head was "I can...I will". Such small words with such large meaning. WOW....I have probably repeated this in my head now damn near a hundred times. Every time I say these words I get more and more excited to find out the WOD's and less and less worried what heat I'm in. Thinking about getting "marked up" makes me smile. Sporting my brand spankin new 512 CrossFit tee makes me feel proud. I am healthy and able to have the opportunity to compete at this elite level with so many amazing and humble athletes and coaches. I am an elite athlete and I have worked hard to be at that level so I'm going to be damn proud to say it and most of all I WILL BELIEVE IT. I know my Nana and Sister Sledge are going to be keeping an eye on me this weekend as I push myself well beyond the threshold of pain....I can...I will...I can...I will....I WANT IT!

Good Luck to all the amazing athletes that are competing this weekend. 512 CrossFit is ready to bring some heat.....we choose to be the Light.

Living life positive........the only way

Being hard on yourself........my relationship with CrossFit

I haven't posted in a while and I apologize. It's almost like I have had so much to say and haven't known where to start. Full of emotions and typing into oblivion. So I keep erasing and starting over. Not anymore. I need to better myself and I believe that sharing what I am mentally and physically going through with others will only make me a better me. I have had a rough week beating myself up for not being good enough at something I love. Something I want to be so good at that it makes me sick. Something that I dream about almost every night when I close my eyes....CrossFit. Some (maybe most) will think this is stupid and ridiculous but honestly I really don't care. Have your own opinion because I have something in my life now that makes me a better person every day. Mentally, physically and emotionally. Something that breaks me down in minutes but builds me up towards the rest of my life. EVERYDAY.

Anyone that truly knows me knows how hard I am on myself. That I think way to much about what I could be doing better rather than what I have improved on. What I am not good at, rather than what I do well. A perfect example is when I won my Figure competition. I was standing at the bottom of the stage holding my 2 swords that I bled blood sweat and tears for. I stood there after going through 4 of the hardest month's of my life asking my workout partner if he thought they had made a mistake. If he thought I should have won. Really?? Really? Who does that? I mean come on...you WON...and you worked harder than you ever could imagine possible and deserve it!! Geeeeeze!

SOOOOOOO.........There you go. That pretty much sums me up. Always reaching out to better someone. Complimenting them any chance I can, helping to boost them up. To feel better about themselves and become a person they never thought they could be. Why can't I give that to myself? Why is that so hard for me? Can I do this for myself? YES AND I WILL.

I am making a commitment to myself and my relationship with CrossFit to be proud of myself at my lowest point. To believe in myself when the tears roll down my check and all I want is to give up. To be humble when I reach the top (and I will). Be patient with myself when I get frustrated. To compliment myself when the smallest baby step towards a better CrossFitter has been achieved. To remind myself that I am not perfect. That I can and will be great... for I am CrossFit.


"I have shed blood, I have shed sweat and by god I have shed tears to make myself a true competitor in the upcoming CrossFit sectionals. I know, without a doubt that I have pushed myself harder in these past few weeks than I have ever pushed myself. Both physically and mentally I have taken my level of training and dedication for that matter to an elite level. It is only here, at the very top, that i may achieve that which I know I deserve....Greatness!" This amazing quote is compliments of the person who convinced me to grow some you know what's and to sign up for something that scares the living life out of me....Coach Matty.

"In order to change we must be sick and tired of being sick and tired"

I had one of my amazing clients Lori tell me yesterday to start blogging healthy idea's/recipes. Most of these will be paleo. This is just how I chose to live my life and what I promote. It can seem like a pain to eat this way until your try. I highly recommend it. It will change your life and your families lives.

This first one is awesome! Enjoy!

Paleo Apple Muffins

Preheat oven to 350 and spray muffin tins with organic cooking spray or line with paper cups.

2 c. almond flour (it can be expensive. I make my own with the food processor and bulk almonds...pulse until it's a cornmeal-like consistency)
1/2 tsp. sea salt
1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/4 c. Arrowroot Powder (you can also buy from bulk section)
1 Banana
1 tsp. cinnamon
1/2 c. unsweetened applesauce
1 large egg
2 medium apples, diced
Combine dry ingredients in one bowl. Combine wet ingredients in the other. Stir wet into dry and fold in apples.

Bake for 25-30 minutes

Zone/Paleo Blocks (if divided by 12 muffins):

1.25 Carb blocks/2 fat blocks/1.5 protein blocks

If you're counting calories, one equals 85.5 cals.

Why Paleo is better.....76 ways sugar can ruin your health.

If this doesn't keep you from limiting those sweet tooth choices we all love I don't know what will.....Enjoy.

In addition to throwing off the body's homeostasis, excess sugar may result in a number of other significant consequences. The following is a listing of some of sugar's metabolic consequences from a variety of medical journals and other scientific publications.

1.Sugar can suppress your immune system and impair your defenses against infectious disease.

2.Sugar upsets the mineral relationships in your body: causes chromium and copper deficiencies and interferes with absorption of calcium and magnesium.

3.Sugar can cause can cause a rapid rise of adrenaline, hyperactivity, anxiety, difficulty concentrating, and crankiness in children.

4.Sugar can produce a significant rise in total cholesterol, triglycerides and bad cholesterol and a decrease in good cholesterol.

5.Sugar causes a loss of tissue elasticity and function.

6.Sugar feeds cancer cells and has been connected with the development of cancer of the breast, ovaries, prostate, rectum, pancreas, biliary tract, lung, gallbladder and stomach.

7.Sugar can increase fasting levels of glucose and can cause reactive hypoglycemia.

8.Sugar can weaken eyesight.

9.Sugar can cause many problems with the gastrointestinal tract including: an acidic digestive tract, indigestion, malabsorption in patients with functional bowel disease, increased risk of Crohn's disease, and ulcerative colitis.

10.Sugar can cause premature aging.

11.Sugar can lead to alcoholism.

12.Sugar can cause your saliva to become acidic, tooth decay, and periodontal disease.

13.Sugar contributes to obesity.

14.Sugar can cause autoimmune diseases such as: arthritis, asthma, multiple sclerosis.

15.Sugar greatly assists the uncontrolled growth of Candida Albicans (yeast infections)

16.Sugar can cause gallstones.

17.Sugar can cause appendicitis.

18.Sugar can cause hemorrhoids.

19.Sugar can cause varicose veins.

20.Sugar can elevate glucose and insulin responses in oral contraceptive users.

21.Sugar can contribute to osteoporosis.

22.Sugar can cause a decrease in your insulin sensitivity thereby causing an abnormally high insulin levels and eventually diabetes.

23.Sugar can lower your Vitamin E levels.

24.Sugar can increase your systolic blood pressure.

25.Sugar can cause drowsiness and decreased activity in children.

26.High sugar intake increases advanced glycation end products (AGEs)(Sugar molecules attaching to and thereby damaging proteins in the body).

27.Sugar can interfere with your absorption of protein.

28.Sugar causes food allergies.

29.Sugar can cause toxemia during pregnancy.

30.Sugar can contribute to eczema in children.

31.Sugar can cause atherosclerosis and cardiovascular disease.

32.Sugar can impair the structure of your DNA.

33.Sugar can change the structure of protein and cause a permanent alteration of the way the proteins act in your body.

34.Sugar can make your skin age by changing the structure of collagen.

35.Sugar can cause cataracts and nearsightedness.

36.Sugar can cause emphysema.

37.High sugar intake can impair the physiological homeostasis of many systems in your body.

38.Sugar lowers the ability of enzymes to function.

39.Sugar intake is higher in people with Parkinson's disease.

40.Sugar can increase the size of your liver by making your liver cells divide and it can increase the amount of liver fat.

41.Sugar can increase kidney size and produce pathological changes in the kidney such as the formation of kidney stones.

42.Sugar can damage your pancreas.

43.Sugar can increase your body's fluid retention.

44.Sugar is enemy #1 of your bowel movement.

45.Sugar can compromise the lining of your capillaries.

46.Sugar can make your tendons more brittle.

47.Sugar can cause headaches, including migraines.

48.Sugar can reduce the learning capacity, adversely affect school children's grades and cause learning disorders.

49.Sugar can cause an increase in delta, alpha, and theta brain waves which can alter your mind's ability to think clearly.

50.Sugar can cause depression.

51.Sugar can increase your risk of gout.

52.Sugar can increase your risk of Alzheimer's disease.

53.Sugar can cause hormonal imbalances such as: increasing estrogen in men, exacerbating PMS, and decreasing growth hormone.

54.Sugar can lead to dizziness.

55.Diets high in sugar will increase free radicals and oxidative stress.

56.High sucrose diets of subjects with peripheral vascular disease significantly increases platelet adhesion.

57.High sugar consumption of pregnant adolescents can lead to substantial decrease in gestation duration and is associated with a twofold increased risk for delivering a small-for-gestational-age (SGA) infant.

58.Sugar is an addictive substance.

59.Sugar can be intoxicating, similar to alcohol.

60.Sugar given to premature babies can affect the amount of carbon dioxide they produce.

61.Decrease in sugar intake can increase emotional stability.

62.Your body changes sugar into 2 to 5 times more fat in the bloodstream than it does starch.

63.The rapid absorption of sugar promotes excessive food intake in obese subjects.

64.Sugar can worsen the symptoms of children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)

65.Sugar adversely affects urinary electrolyte composition.

66.Sugar can slow down the ability of your adrenal glands to function.

67.Sugar has the potential of inducing abnormal metabolic processes in a normal healthy individual and to promote chronic degenerative diseases.

68.I.V.s (intravenous feedings) of sugar water can cut off oxygen to your brain.

69.Sugar increases your risk of polio.

70.High sugar intake can cause epileptic seizures.

71.Sugar causes high blood pressure in obese people.

72.In intensive care units: Limiting sugar saves lives.

73.Sugar may induce cell death.

74.In juvenile rehabilitation camps, when children were put on a low sugar diet, there was a 44 percent drop in antisocial behavior.

75.Sugar dehydrates newborns.

76.Sugar can cause gum disease.

Day 6....

Today is Day 6 of my Paleo Challenge and I can say that there are for sure a few things that I miss. Stupid things like my liquid Stevia and my bars. Oh and that I usually have a non-paleo cheat meal every 6 days or so. I have been having some cravings so I have been changing up my food more than normal. Looking for new recipes and thinking of creative ideas is a must I think on Paleo. Our world is so consumed with all the bad foods that it is very easy to fall back in that trap. Trap of death. And that is truly what it is. What people are eating day in and day out is killing them and it seems to be one of the last thing on every one's mind. Now let me set something straight. I am NOT perfect.Actually nowhere near. I do eat crap from time to time(in moderation) and love not sharing a bottle of wine with anyone. "My Wine...All Mine" as I like to say. But I truly care and worry about what I am eating. For the first time in my life I am not eating a certain way to do a competition, lean up, look better in my bathing suit or to look better than ever in my Birthday dress. I am eating the way I do because I feel the difference. And it is the most amazing feeling in the world. I can't wait to see how I feel on day 30. It can only get better!

Day 1....

It is the end of Day 1 of my 30 day paleo challenge. I would have to say tonight was harder then I thought. Most of the cravings are due to my day of crappy eating before starting my challenge yesterday. Was it necessary? NO. Will it help me not cheat on my challenge? No. Did I pretty much use it as an excuse to eat whatever I wanted? Yes. And now I am paying for it. All of the hard work of getting all of those horrible cravings to go away and here they are knocking on my door again. I will fight through and succeed. I can do anything I put my mind through. PLUS IT'S JUST FOOD DAMMIT!!! I'm gonna go grab an apple;)

Day 1

All natural, no nitrates and fillers Sausage 1 link
1 pear

3 oz chicken
3 cups lettuce
3 spoon fulls of salsa
3 tablespoons avocado

extra lean ground beef with Roma's, yellow onions,mushrooms cooked with cilantro fresh garlic and coconut oil.
lettuce
salsa

apple
almond butter (prob to much but trying to beat my cravings will do better tomo!)

Tomorrow I shop again to fill up on amazing Paleo foods!
salsa